Hall of Fame quarterback Troy Aikman reportedly paid his ex-wife $1.75 million as part of their divorce settlement. Probably the biggest hit he's ever taken in the pocket.

Paul McCartney turned 70 in June. Now he can't remember when he was 64.


HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAUL McCARTNEY

White Sox slugger Adam Dunn is on pace for 260 strikeouts in one season. Which would beat the old record of striking out 223 times, set when I was dating.

A Michigan woman won the 8th annual Toilet Paper Wedding Dress contest in New York. Afterwards, she flushed with pride.

The town of Middleboro (Mass.) passed a bylaw that outlaws swearing in public. For good measure, they banned hockey players.

Scientists claim newly discovered fossils of two turtles suggest they were having sex when they died. Now that's what I call a big bang theory.

Reuters says 1,000 people worldwide have Kleine Levin Syndrome—sleeping for months at a time. In Canada, we call it Toronto Maple Leaf Disorder.

According to Forbes, Gisele Bundchen earns $45 million a year, almost five times what any other model makes. Shouldn't she have married a N.Y. Yankee?


GISELE BUNDCHEN: A YANKEE OF MODELLING? 

Word out of Winnipeg is the Bombers' new stadium won't be completed this season. Same goes for most of Buck Pierce's passes.

A new study says defendants whose alibi is watching porn instead of a regular movie are less likely to be found guilty. So it's a good way to get off.

The top three displays at Michigan's so-called Museum of Failed Products:  
3. Yogurt shampoo;  
2. Caffeinated beer;  
1. The Chicago Cubs.

Former Playmate of the Year Jenny McCarthy accidentally sent her son's dentist a nude photo of herself. Or as they call it in dentistry, an XXX-ray.


JENNY McCARTHY DATING BEARS LB BRIAN URLACHER

The Toronto Blue Jays pitching in brief: Right-handed, left-handed and short-handed.

I just watched a CFL preseason game, with the usual assortment of blunders, blown calls and confusion about Canadian rules. But enough about Rod Black.